After a few years of treatment under my belt, I'm embarrassed to say that it's taken me this long to take seriously the issues with toxins separate of Lyme. I've gone on and off of the "Lyme Diet," caving in to sweets and gluten when I'm feeling extra terrible (half because I actually crave it, and half because I have the tendency to be a destructive emotional eater when I feel like nothing matters anymore.)
But as I shunned the toxic sugar and gluten, I paid no attention to talk about mold and chemical toxins and how they affect the body. I still can't speak eloquently on the topic... right now I'm still in the curiosity/research stage, so if you have and info to share PLEASE do so in the comment section.
What piqued my interest is that my doctor keeps bringing up the issue of detoxification--something I could take or leave as I spent the last few years just pumping myself full of antibiotics. (Yes, dumb in retrospect.) As I sat this weekend in a haze of dizziness, nausea, and pain, I was brought back to a mental place I hadn't seen in three years.
I took my mother's advice and spent an hour sitting in a chair on her deck while she pushed the baby around in the stroller. Just watching the motion made me seasick. Sounds were coming in and out. The trees were a fuzzy blur. My heart rate kept speeding up, slowing down. I felt like I had 4 different strains of the flu, if that makes any sense. It was as if my body and my mind weren't connected at all. I couldn't cross my legs. They just wouldn't cooperate. I literally had to focus: "Come on legs, cross now...come on hand, pick up the cup." I could do it, it just took time to connect. Anyway, like I said, it's been forever since I've been here, and by here I mean plagued with a scary thought: Might I be dying? Is this what it feels like? I'm so out of it and tired, I could honestly just close my eyes and float away.
Then rationalization steps in. "Sara, you are not dying. You've felt this way before. It passes. And you don't have time to die anyway... the baby needs a bath and a bottle in 20 minutes." Still, I started to cry. I hope I'm not the only nutcase that has done this--jumps to the conclusion that they are about to croak and then actually starts crying over the made up death scene they feel they're about to experience. Anyway, it did in fact pass after a long nap, but not before desperation set it.
There HAS to be something more to this whole treatment thing. I can't be feeling like total shit just because I'm pregnant.
I am stretching far for answers, because I am stumped.
Out of nowhere, the Universe finally threw me a bone (yay for OBVIOUS signs) and flooded our basement. It happens quite often, but not to this extent. We live at the bottom of a grassy hill, we have a concrete slab basement with a billion cracks, and it's been raining like a bible catastrophe for the past week. The ground water seeps in (in this case it poured in) and no matter what we do, we can't get it to dry out down there. This time it reeks badly. I can smell it right now as I type, circulating through the house. Like old, moldy towels or a dark, drippy cave. The key word is mold. It's never smelled like this before. If we didn't have a mold issue before (which I'm assuming we did, as there's always some water coming in the basement) we certainly have one now. I think it's bad when you can actually smell it, right?
Now I'm in a state of anxiety trying to figure out how to fix this expensive problem, and on top of that, I'm a mess because my overactive brain keeps reminding me that every breath I take in is giving me a nice dose of toxins. I asked my old friend Google about Lyme and mold, and I found this article (written in a Lyme for Dummies style, so forgive me if you're way above this--I'm still new.)
http://lymebook.com/blog/the-recovery-process/mold-and-lyme-toxins/
Makes total sense to me. Now what do I do? Anyone have experience with mold or other toxins? Did it exacerbate your symptoms? How did you treat the problem? Anything you can safely take during pregnancy?
So grateful I have a LLMD appointment tomorrow. I'll ask him about it too and report back soon.
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